The role of empathy in counselling has long considered an important tool. Showing empathy indicates that a counsellor is listening, understanding and experiencing an individual’s emotional experience. Empathy promotes the development, strengthening and maintenance of a variety of interpersonal relationships. These may include feeling what someone else is feeling, and perspective-taking. Gaining this type of information contribute to motivating one to show empathic concern for another who may be experiencing distress.
Empathy can be defined as “understanding & sharing the feelings of others, fostering connection & compassion.” Without empathy individuals in relationships cannot understand why someone is feeling as they do or are behaving in a certain way. When counsellors engage in empathy it encourages them to dig deeper, strengthen the therapeutic alliance and boost the likelihood of a successful treatment outcome. Empathy is something a counsellor has to experience before it can be expressed. Indeed, accurate and heartfelt sharing of empathy is considered curative in itself. The counsellor’s empathy and acceptance promote breaking of the isolation, validation, strengthening of the self, and self-acceptance.
Counsellors engage use the practice of empathic listening to gather the information necessary to convey empathy ijn a heartfelt manner. This entails getting inside the other person’s perspective and see the world the way they do. This skill requires the listen to use their eyes, ears, and heart to listen. This is note achieved through passive listening where a counsellor is just hearing surface words or speech. Attentive listening requires active engagement with individuals, focussing on their words, emotions, and non-verbal cures. This type of listening builds bridges in relationships and supports a collaborative therapeutic process.
Exercise: How to improve showing empathy in your personal relationships.
Acknowledge the person’s emotions and perspectives, even if they are different than your own.
Suspend judgment as everyone is entitled to their own perspective and emotions.
Show compassion, which will foster more trust and open sharing.
Reflect to the person what you heard, felt and saw
Reference
How to Improve Empathic Listening Skills: 7 techniques. By Chistina R Wilson PhD. Positive Psychology 29Oct21.
